My Life in Christ

St. John of Kronstadt

Source: E. E. Goulaeff translation, Cassell & Company, London, 1897 — public domain (archive.org mylifeinchristex00serguoft, confirmed NOT_IN_COPYRIGHT).

  1. Chapter 1
  2. Chapter 2
  3. Chapter 3
  4. Chapter 4
  5. Chapter 5
  6. Chapter 6
  7. Chapter 7
  8. Chapter 8
  9. Chapter 9
  10. Chapter 10
  11. Chapter 11
  12. Chapter 12
  13. Chapter 13
  14. Chapter 14
  15. Chapter 15
  16. Chapter 16
  17. Chapter 17
  18. Chapter 18
  19. Chapter 19
  20. Chapter 20
  21. Chapter 21

Faith in God's existence is closely connected with faith in the existence of our own souls, as a part of the spiritual world. God's existence is as evident to the pious mind as its own being, because every thought, good or bad, every desire, every intention, word or act of such a mind is followed by a corresponding change in the state of the heart, peace or trouble, joy or grief, and this is the result of the action upon it of the God of spirits and bodies, Who is reflected in the pious mind as the sun is reflected in a drop of water; the, purer the drop is, the better, the clearer will be the reflection; the more turbid the drop, the dimmer will be the reflection; so that in the soul's state of extreme impurity or darkness, the reflection entirely ceases and the soul is left in a state of spiritual darkness, in a state of insensibility. In this state the man having eyes, sees not, and having ears, hears not. Again, in relation to our souls, God may be likened to the outer air in relation to the mercury of the thermometer — with this difference, that the expansion and rest, rise and fall of the mercury proceed from the change in the state of the atmo sphere; whilst, in the first case, God remains unchangeable, everlasting and eternally good and just. Whilst the soul, changeable in its relation to God, sutlers changes in itself, thus it unavoidably expands and obtains peace of heart when it draws nearer to God by faith and good works, and unavoid ably contracts, becomes restless and wearied, when it with draws itself from God by unlawful acts, want of faith, and unbelief in God's Truth.

The evil spirit tries to scatter prayer as if it were a sand- heap, tries to turn the words into dry sand, without coherency or moisture — that is to say, without fervour of heart. Thus prayer may become either a house built on sand or a house built on a rock. Those build on sand who pray without faith, absently, coldly: such prayer is scattered of itself, and does not bring any profit to him who prays; those build on a rock who, during the whole time of their prayer, have their eyes fixed upon God, and pray to Him as to a living person, conversing face to face with them.

Edifying words, the writings of the Holy Fathers, prayers, and especially the words of the Word Himself, the Second Person of the Holy Trinity, are indeed living water; w_ater runs, and the words flow like water; water refreshes and gives life_ to^jthe^^bpdy,; and edifying words animate the soul, filling it with peace and joj^^or with compunctiori ariH^con- trition for sin.

Our hope of obtaining that which we ask for during prayer is founded upon faith in God's mercy and bouiitifulness, for He is the God of mercy and bouiitifulness, and the Lover of men; therefore at that time it is useful to remind ourselves of former innumerable experiences of mercy and grace bestowed upon men (in Holy Writ and in the lives of the Saints) and upon ourselves. Besides this, in order that prayer may be effectual